Beyond the trance of dependence

We have a thorn in the flesh, which is our cross… and our salvation.

We struggle against ourselves, against our flesh. We are struggling toward freedom. We are making a great escape from sin, with God’s help.

The sin is lust. The flight is from a lie of life-long, seemingly inescapable dependence.

Formed at an early age or from chronic repetition of disordered behaviors, we became ensnared. But our dependency, whether accidental or deliberately constructed, was is and always will be, false.

The cumulative effect of immersion in disorder and sin is that it seems impossible to change or undo. At some very deep level we tell ourselves another lie, “there is no other way, there has never appeared another way”.

But this will forever remain also a lie, a weak conclusion from clouded, limited human judgment, disbelief in God’s powers, insufficient desire to overcome, of small faith, and unfortunately, love for the sin.

Other factors include indolence or refusal to suffer purification and purity, deeply ingrained habit, impatience with the length of healing and recovery, resentment of temptation.

There is always another way >> hope.

There is always another way >> prayer.

There is always another way >> action.

There is always another way >> greater faith.

There is always another way >> repeating these four things again until something changes.

We cannot free ourselves. It is God’s grace that frees us, God’s strength that conquers. The simple way out always remains: Jesus. Do we want His victory? Or do we still want our precious freewill? We either worship the creation or we worship the Creator, the flesh or the Spirit, lust or chastity.

Our atomic issue is desire, enough desire for freedom and transformation. Right desire is something we once foundationally lacked. We must pray, above all other things, to be relieved of this poverty of right desire, because, if one doesn’t want to be free from lust, one never will be.

God in Heaven You know all, You know what we need. Give to us what we cannot give ourselves, a deep revulsion to lust and the desire for habitual holy comportment of our sexual faculties. Make us love what You want for us in the life of our masculine bodies. Give us humility, strength and patience to heal, give us the grace to be transformed however slowly the process unfolds, give us perseverance to see the death of the trance of dependence. We beg in Jesus’ name believing with great faith that You alone can do this. Amen.